don’t rock the boat baby


Something that pains me just happened

I believe that you should own up to your past no matter how much you’ve lied, I didn’t do that for a long time in my life. I would lie and lie and lie. But I’m not there anymore, truth is exactly what everyone needs.

That being said I want to apologize to my Ex for telling him I moved to winnipeg when I didn’t. I was afraid of what he would do or say if he knew I was back home in Arizona. So I’m apologizing to him. I have no other way because I have cut contact with him, or at least I’ve tried.

I admit after we broke up we did talk once, but it ended ugly and I didn’t want anything to do with him again. Unfortunately he found my blog, through whatever means, I want the world to see it, so that’s fine, and he discovered I lied to him again. I understand he was angry, that’s why he went through such lengths to make me think he was a different person so he could get me into a discord server and tell me I lied to him.

If there is anything in this world that scares me anymore, unfortunately it’s him, I’m sorry. He’s a wonderful person, but we’re horrible together. That being said, to anyone out there who wants to talk to their ex-but doesn’t know how, please don’t trick them into talking to you. It’s awful, but I’ll take it as an eye for an eye, he got me back for lieing to him one last time.

Either way I spoke my peace, thank you for listening, you whispers in the wind.


Fancy as a can of Pickles

I realized my second header text was the same size as the first…and it just didn’t look right, so lets try this.

Hey there everyone that doesn’t exist but probably will at one point. I finished up watching Deadly Premonition again, I love how lax my memory is for games, I can give myself a couple years and not REALLY remember how things go. So shock is shocking. It’s truely wonderful.

I’m not sure if I wrote it somewhere, but I’ll write it here, one of my desires is to use graphic design to fund me going and doing cosplay around the world. Silly passion I know, but it’s my decision, and doesn’t effect anyone. Well I decided to start on my costume for next years Comic-Con, my friend decided to do it with me, so I choose stein;gate as our anime. It works because she has a whole slew of different character types to choose from. Of course I’m going to play as Faris Nyannyan, because…yes. 

I saved links for all the materials I’ll need. The shoes were especially hard to find…then I thought real-life meets anime is what? “Lolita.” Yep, lolita shoes. So when I thought about that it was much easier to find.

I also started to draw up what I needed to do for my design…mind you I have never made clothings before. But that’s besides the point, I did it, and I know what I need to do now. 



So now I have nothing left to do until I can buy materials. So I excercised super epic hard, and I made my desktop background roll only Faris, just to remind me “slow and steady ain’t going to cut it.” So though I’ve lost 50lbs since June, that might need to be ramped up. 

And that’s it, for now. Enjoy my bad drawings and too quick spelling. ^.^


I have more to say, but can’t think of it

Becoming completely Linked

So I have been rolling it around in my head for a while and decided that my media needs to be connected, I have my special little snowflake account, also known as tumblr, twitter and this, of course.

I thought about connecting my FB, but I feel very un about that so. Yes, I meant un.

Rewatching through supergreatfriend’s Deadly Premonition walkthrough, made me remember D4: Dark Dreams Don’t Die, which he also has a let’s play of…so just saying. (Btw im not connected to him at all, I just enjoy his let’s plays a lot) and Swery or Hidetaka Suehiro who is the director of the two games hasn’t announced part two. So I run to his twitter and find something about a game called The Good Life, it looks….like it belongs on a DS of some sort. Either way I’ll look into it.

Finished Resident Evil 7, I started writing a review, but I could clear my ram enough to finish it without my computer lagging up a storm (yes I know I fail because I only have 8 gigs, bite me) So I lost my progress and said “Fuck it” to starting again. Mind you the DLC promised for April never hit so I might wait to review until then, we’ll see.

Also new GIF, homebrewed.

 Fallout 4 Headshot GIF


And so the shining glows

Hey there it’s been  a while

So, I don’t have an audence yet but at one point I will, so I figured the best thing to do was write as often as possible. Someone will get interested sometime and read through. If not at least I have an outlet

That being said I haven’t writen because I’ve been too lazy to write, truely lazy. Art went away for a little bit, did some though.





Went shooting, I live in the southwest so we went out to the desert and just unloaded clip after clip into things we brought things that were already there and just random holes in the ground. I went camping a lot as a child and we always brought the guns. I had my first gun a .22 Marlin Rifle under the age of 10, I was damn accurate with it too, that was before I had to wear glasses, and had big boobs. His name is Merlin the Wizard, I can’t sight him anymore but I let everyone else shoot him, so he doesn’t grow weak in his old age.



This whole meat and dairy free thing is going well. My dad wanted to have pizza this weekend, I can tolerate dairy enough to not want to roll up in the featus postion and cry myself to sleep, but he wanted a supreme. I tried my hardest to move the meat to the other side, but the sausage provded to be a mighty foe. Either way I ate meat (I was hoping that maybe my galbladder healed enough that I could tolerate it like I do dairy) it kinda killed me for a day but I learned my lesson, no meat. 

But I have started cooking with tofu a lot. I had it in miso soup at first, got tired of that so I started pan frying it with cucumber. Which is damn good, here is pictures of my first fry but i’ve gotten better since then. Tried baking them….the trick to tofu for crispy is cornstarch fried in oil. I use coconut.
Playing a lot of games, my last usb port died on my laptop so now I have to figure out how to play not only without an mmo mouse but also with a touchpad, but at least I have a touchpad. I have a bluetooth enabled laptop, so next step is to get a bluetooth mouse, or replace my usb ports.
That being said I have to watch stuffs while I play, so almost finished The Strain, last two episodes aren’t up on the site I use, so Imma wait for that. Tried watching Stitchers, ish scifi I guess, not my cup of tea. Now watching The Walking Dead again with my dad when he’s home. So what do I watch when I’m alone….LET’S PLAYS!!!! There is something so appealing about a horror let’s play. So I watched TheRadBrad‘s Outlast 2 let’s play, which was good, glad I watched it. Now I’m a Resident Evil fangirl, I would get the umbrella symbol tattooed if it wasn’t a fucking umbrella. I was going to play 7, even thought survival horror scares the shit out of me, but I saw, that my favorite let’s player did it….I had to watch it. If you ever hear of me, I fucking love you supergreatfriend, I always will. But either way he did a lets play of Resident Evil 7, and I have a burning desire to watch it. So that’s what im doing, while farming for herbs in ESO.
And that’s my life atm ppls, Enjoy

Today’s Rant

The Room Roll


Here’s images of my room, I call her the inspirational space. I will lay, look around and think. It’s pretty amazing to get lost in thought and just let your mind wander.


I finished watching AHS, and with Pivus being done I’m kind of left with nothing to do.

I started Bates Motel, it’s okay but the mom is so annoying I don’t think I can keep watching it.

Women that live their life by the ways of “cry me a river” have no use being a woman, or a person for that matter.


Either way, that’s my rant for the day.


Game Announcement

Pivus Icon

Welcome to the Pivus announcement.

My vidya prog friend worked on this project for a while, I did, as he put it, the 2D art. He’s not proud of the game, but I think it turned out amazingly.

“Pivus is a unique speed puzzle-solving game, with a simple but challenging mechanic. Spin three-dimensional shapes so that they fit inside the holes in incoming walls, similar to a certain Japanese game show.”

Quote taken from the googleplay store. Pretty much you rotate a 3D shape to fit through the hole coming at your face. depending on your mind’s prespective eye, this game can be difficult or a a cake walk.

Probably the best part of making the game was getting the colors right. Bright, but not too bright, intense, but not annoying.


Either way I hope you enjoy the game, and even if you don’t like the mechanics, pass the idea of the download to your friend. Thanks a lot.



Go ahead and download it, it’s free on googleplay.

Also coming to iOS soon, (I’ll post when)

Random Rant

Internet Lag, probably the worst thing ever.


Most of my life consists of doing art and playing catch up of shows I wasn’t able to watch as they came out.

Right now I’m on an American Horror Story kick.


I sit down with some amazing sushi, a monster, and a fresh episode to watch. I know my internet is shit, talk about value internet. (Just so you know, centurylink has unreliable internet, bad customer service and will also tag you for a DMCA, make you agree to never download pirated material again and restore your internet) So I push play, push pause, let it buffer and come back 5 minutes later. A piece into my sushi and it stops. Oh I don’t get angry at many things, lag and wifi outage are my kryptonite. So I push pause and let it buffer, then click play it does it again. So I finish up my sushi (which might I add is very depressing to eat when you are trying to deal with lag/internet outage) and now im here because im frustrated.


My Mind

On a lighter note. I drew my first picture im proud of. I’m going to try to get a scan going, but atm I have this horrible webcam picture.